Fighting pain . . . again

Today was a medical appointment day - one appointment, lots of follow-up with pharmacists. What I learned from the oncologist was that the last treatment, Gemzar, failed. The pain was not seen as from radiation burning, but from the tumor. The oncologist expected the pain to improve, not worsen.

So a new treatment was begun, two pills taken daily, one of which was just approved. Demi, as you can see, went along for - to her - one more boring day at the clinic.  She was either standing in line with me or standing in line with Steve, but it wasn't play-day with the nurses.  In fact, since the treatment failed, tomorrow's chemotherapy was cancelled and we have the day to ourselves at home.

I was able to get the patch doubled so I'm hoping there will be less pain this next week.  I was also given another "jug" of liquid morphine. The nurse said I can have as much as I want, that I shouldn't be living with pain.  I guess that means I'm terminal.  I mean, if I can have as much morphine as I want, what does that say to me?  I was trying to keep it down to one dose per hour, but even that wasn't enough.  She also said that I will sleep all day tomorrow as I gradually get used to the higher dosage.

Tomorrow..... day off!