On 01.02.02, I was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer. Too late for surgery, I had chemotherapy, which failed. In May the chemotherapy was changed and I was soon in remission which was celebrated and welcome and lasted nine years - until October 2011. There was progression in 2011 so more treatment was indicated and I am now back in partial remission. But I'm not only a cancer patient - I also enjoy my family, walk my dogs and am learning to draw and paint. Life is good!

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Professional patient

I did not get the good news that I was hoping for when I went to see the doctor today.  Instead I walked away after learning that I now have bladder cancer, something I was completely unprepared for.  I've been treated for Stage 4 breast cancer for 9-1/2 years, but this is an entirely new primary tumor, completely unrelated to that.  I feel absolutely and totally doomed.  Surgery, thank god it will be outpatient, is scheduled for next month.

In the meantime I went to my watercolor class this afternoon, tried to focus and keep things routine and normal. 'Twasn't easy!  I was teary and distracted and cried all the way home.  I am so not a happy camper this day.

Duh.

5 comments:

  1. Barbara,
    Many prayers and lots of love are headed to you. I wish I could do more. Thank you so much for sharing. Cancer really needs its butt kicked.

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  2. I'm sorry for your bad news. I will be praying for you as well. Keep on thinking positive; your little bird is so beautifully done and so peaceful. I'll pray for peace for you as you go through this.

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  3. Barbara;
    I am so sorry for this bad news you have endured. I pray that God is with you during this time and I thank God that you have your art to help you through it too. I know that it feels really bad right now but God is and will always be with you. I will continue to pray for you, may you feel His comfort and presence with you through all of this. Your watercolor is beautiful.
    Hugs and blessings.

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  4. Oh, Barbara. I am sitting here, dumbfounded at the news. Know that I'm sending good thoughts your way. (I wish they could work some magic of their own.)

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  5. Thank you all. I'm coping, sort of, and gathering information which makes it less daunting. I think it's all going to turn out OK, just rocked my little world. - Barbara

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