On 01.02.02, I was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer. Too late for surgery, I had chemotherapy, which failed. In May the chemotherapy was changed and I was soon in remission which was celebrated and welcome and lasted nine years - until October 2011. There was progression in 2011 so more treatment was indicated and I am now back in partial remission. But I'm not only a cancer patient - I also enjoy my family, walk my dogs and am learning to draw and paint. Life is good!

Friday, December 14, 2007

The score: ADD is winning

Now I really have holiday stress. It's coming in two forms - overstimulation and disorganization. I have had four Christmas parties in my planner this week and another one scheduled for next week. Each one is a social grouping of people I enjoy and care about -- if the get-togethers hadn't already been planned I would have suggested it myself. But the larger the gathering, the more conversations happening at once, the more I feel like a corgi in traffic.*

The disorganization is worse. I'm still looking for addresses for Christmas cards. There were two new ones from last year that were so important to me that I remember writing them down so I wouldn't lose them. But when I opened my address book it was a case of disappearing ink, so where did I write them? I've looked and looked and I can't find them anywhere.

Worse yet, Steve gave me two gift suggestions of books and DVDs that he would appreciate receiving. I remember putting the little slips of paper next to me where I was working. But eventually that pile of papers got out of hand so I swooped it up and moved it - to where? It's the nth hour, I NEED THOSE PAPERS!

And I know I'm due in chemo on Tuesday morning. At what time? The nurse gave me the January calendar less than two weeks ago and kindly reprinted the December one because Beulie ate the original copy. I didn't have my planner with me so I couldn't make the entries in the moment, which would have saved the day, and now I can't find those two calendar pages and I so don't want to call the infusion center AGAIN and ask what time I should show up. I.AM. SO. FRUSTRATED.

*Corgis are herding dogs. Most do well on the freeway where traffic is streaming in one direction. But it isn't unusual for them to flip out in a car in downtown chaos where cars are going in four directions and they can't herd them into order that makes sense to them.

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